FANCY FILLY FINANCING

(new lyrics to: GRANDMA’S IN THE CELLAR)

I-rish I had a shilling

For redheads unwilling

To give me even the time of day…

For many the lass

Who this poor boy will pass

Refusing to go e’en part of the way!

–

Chasing gold

Gets old

When the end of rainbows run away…

The finest Irish girls

Using me for finger twirls

Then finding another man with which to stay.

–

A guy just off the boat

Decided to devote

Energies to take away my Carol girl…

This Irish boy called George

Deepened the gorge

By taking Carol out for a whirl.

–

Spoke a line,

Spent his dime

To steal away my only first girlfriend…

Held back a grade he was mature

Making his girl conquest sure,

I barely saw her ’til the school year’s end!

–Jonathan Caswell