CAMERA SEES!
(to tune of “Animal Crackers in My Soup”)
–
Dribbled all over, hot dog juice,
Through a hole in the package loose,
Making a mess that folks can see
Looking at the camera pointed at me!
–
Cleaning it up with a napkin spare,
Hoping no one will look down there…
Got my lunch assembled now,
Hoping no one calls me a cow!
–Jonathan Caswell
BAD ELF
Oh, if he had a cell phone
For photoing secretly…
He’d get snapshots of his favorite girls,
Developed to a “T”.
–
His camera would not need a flash
‘Twould automatically adjust…
Getting best views that he would choose,
Whether face or form or bust.
–
Alas, no such camera does exist,
At least not that he’s aware…
He’ll have to trust to memory
The bodies beyond compare!
–Jonathan Caswell
NEEDLES ON CAMERA
My supper insulin
Is necessarily taken..
Sitting at the desk
In full view I guess,
Of whomever wants to look in.
–
There is a camera too,
So that I am in full view…
Most folks I show
Already know
My need for the needle cue.
–
Problem is–I’ve been skipping–
And over self-neglect been tripping…
My results are skewed
When doctor-reviewed,
They’d rather my blood sugars dipping.
–
It’s back, as always, to me,
Doing what is necessary…
Wanting to do
For the sake of me too,
A healthy fait de compli.
–Jonathan Caswell
POTENTIAL SHUTTERBUG
The man had an eye for figures
And faces that he might frame…
But women around him were wary
Because of his actions inane.
–
He always signalled so far ahead
He was coming in for the kill…
That many beauties up and fled,
Rather than submit to his thrill.
–
The guy never got a cell phone,
Nor less, a camera within…
Look out all you lovely ladies
When he finally does give in!
—Jonathan Caswell
By the Mighty Mumford 