(www.safe4work.org)

SEASONAL CHARGES***

(A song parody of “I Wear My Pink Pajamas”)

(1.) I wash my fingers often in the Summer when it’s hot,

And wear wooly mittens in the winter when it’s not,

But sometimes in the Springtime

And sometimes in the Fall…

I get a static shock

And I jump up the wall!

–

WOE…WOE…WOE…IS ME!

Caught by static ‘tricity….

The door knobs I touch

Sometimes hurt so much,

With a ZAP of built-up charge!

–

(2.) My job is to check door knobs to see if they’re locked,

Strolling on the carpet tends to guarantee me shocked….

I use the back of my hand

To touch the metal frame,

And if there is static, it will not hurt the same!

–

(3.) The seasonal charges do not always cause me grief,

But when I am off the job I forget charge relief…

My fingers touch my kitty’s nose

And he jumps across the room,

He shies away from touching me…

Not trusting me so soon!

–

WOE…WOE…WOE IS ME!

Caught again by static ‘tricity…

The kitty cat may claim

I have done it all the same,

But it happened by stroking his mane!

 

–Jonathan Caswell

(www.school-for-champions.com)

(AUTHOR’S NOTE:***In other words, the tune of “The Battle Hymn of The Republic”)